St. Louis Recap, CIT, and Ali Farokmasdnsenensah

Well, as most of you already know, we lost in the first round of the Missouri Valley Tournament to Bradley. Sam Maniscalco and his dirty half-goatee-type-thing (he only has facial hair on his chin, what is the specific name for this?) had 31 points against us and dashed any hope that our 9-0 opening game run had any significance whatsoever. The Braves ended up winning 81-62, and we were subsequently sent back to Omaha. The rest of the Valley Tourney really didn't garner any other surprises as the expected favorite, Northern Iowa, won the whole thing.


The week after St. Louis was spring break and most of the other conference tournaments were finishing up and/or beginning. It was a very exciting week filled with buzzer beaters, floor burns, a solid defensive stance and Frank Martin stepping WAY outside of his coaching box. Most of the favorites won their conference tournaments, with the exceptions of New Mexico State out of the WAC and Ohio out of the MAC.

Because of our first round exit in St. Louis we got the dubious honor of playing in the CollegeInsider.com Tournament. Yes, you read that correctly. Now I know some of you probably didn't even know this tournament existed, and you have good merit to believe this; it's only the second year this tournament has been up and running. Some experts would have you believe it's the fourth and last best tournament in college basketball, trailing the Big Dance, NIT, and the CBI. So go ahead and get your CIT jokes in now, we're all really impressed. (Sorry, Seinfeld drop there.)

As we're drowning our sorrows in the CIT, fellow Valley...ers? Northern Iowa are doing their thing in the NCAA Tournament. ALLLLIIIII Farokmanesh (I think that's how you spell it) has been the Panther's version of Big Shot Bob Horry by hitting the game winning threes against UNLV Thursday night and everyone's favorite to win the tourney, Kansas, on Saturday night. The man can flat out shoot. About as pretty as a jump shot as you'll see, quite honestly. He looks like Steve Nash and Jeremy Piven's chubby kid, should those two ever mate, and probably shoots just as well as the Phoenix point guard, too. The Panthers' backbone is solid outside shooting, great help defense, and generally just playing much harder than their opponents. They're pretty much what you expect out of an almost all-Caucasian collegiate basketball team. They can't jump, they can't run, they sure as hell can't dunk (Ok, that's a lie), but they enjoy playing with each other and playing the game the right way. As Billy Hoyle once said to Sidney Deane in White Men Can't Jump (oh, the irony of that last sentence), "Yo, pretty boy! I looked up basketball player in the dictionary and it said 'Not you!'" Ok, so that sentence didn't pertain to anything I was discussing about the Northern Iowa Panthers, but I found it amusing and wanted to drop a White Men Can't Jump quote somewhere in this post.

As I finish this post about the hectic world in college basketball these days, I will forge ahead with my next post covering the NCAA Tournament. This next post could be epic, so I'm warning you ahead of time. As Ali Farokmanesh knows all too well...Simple Plays, fellas, simple plays.

Nearing MVC Tourney and a Phenomenal Senior Day

Well, the Missouri Valley Conference Tournament starts today in St. Louis. (Or should I say Arch Madness? The marketing department for the MoValley are beyond clever.) We open play at 2:30 CST against the Bradley Braves for the third time this year. (We won the first two, obviously.) For most Creighton fans, "Arch Madness" or "St. Louis," as most of you simply refer to it as, is even better than receiving a Nintendo 64 for Christmas. It's all I've heard about for the past two months. Most of the CU fan base (especially my friends) use St. Louis as an excuse to support the team and get blitzed out of their minds. It's pretty epic. I'm interested to hear what stories come out of St. Louis this year.


Along with the start of our conference tournament, most low-major conference tournaments have begun this week as well. Some teams are getting close to punching their tickets to the Big Dance as we speak. Cornell is technically the first team to get in because the Ivy League doesn't have a conference tournament, so the regular-season conference winner gets their bid. The Big South will be the second conference to get a bid, with their final tomorrow between Coastal Carolina and Winthrop. For the most part, the small-conference tournaments have begun this week or will begin this weekend.

Besides the exciting time of year that is "Championship Week," as the people at ESPN have dubbed it, we just rounded out or final home game of the year. Senior Night versus the Bradley Braves was an entertaining one, with Bradley even hitting a half-court shot at the buzzer at the end of the first half. Despite 27 points from the Braves' Taylor Brown, we held on to win 82-71. It was a great way for our three seniors to end their careers at the Qwest Center and all that bologna you've probably heard from Coach Altman and everyone else a thousand times. I was excited for our three seniors though. Despite the setbacks and tough times we've had as a team this year, they tried the best they could to make their last season memorable. Three great dudes and great basketball players. Their speeches to the crowd after the game were phenomenal too. Justin and Chad both got a little teary eyed, (actually they both legitimately cried) and all three of them received really nice ovations from the crowd. Our head manager, Brian Kooeniga, was honored too, which was a really nice gesture to him and how much he's meant to the team.

So what better way for Simple Plays to honor the Jays' three senior players and senior manager? To roast them of course! Just kidding. Kind of. I'm not very good at those sorts of things, but I will give you my own personal opinions, thoughts, and stories of the four seniors previously mentioned. Let's get it on.

Brian Kooeniga probably spends triple the time around the Creighton basketball team than he does his own roommates. The man is the absolute backbone to our team. Without him, well, quite frankly, we probably wouldn't even be able to field a team. He does it all. He cuts up game film, types up scouting reports, does all of our laundry, helps run practice, texts every important detail that we need to know about anything basketball-related, and he changes our diapers. He's like Octomom and Dana Altman combined into one. The pride of Urbandale, Iowa, he is the Creighton University Men's Basketball Head Manager. He is OctoDana, err, Brian Kooeniga.

Cavel Witter. Where do I even begin? A genuinely nice human being who, quite simply, just wants to play basketball. That's it. An absolute gym rat and easily the hardest worker on our team, Cavel is a very talented guard. Often criticized for his excessive amount of dribbling and his inane ability to not make the extra pass or "simple play," Cavel has worked his arse off to prove every doubter and critic wrong. I'm not sure if he's exceeded or not, that's your call as a fan, but he definitely has my respect. As Reggie Miller said about Larry Brown in the phenomenal ESPN 30 for 30 documentary Winning Time, "Larry is a perfectionist in an imperfect game." Cavel is the same way.

Justin Carter was put on this earth to do two things: jump abnormally high and virtually speak a foreign language when he is supposed to be speaking the same language as you. Justin has an uncanny ability to twist every single word of the English Dictionary into "Justin-speak." Trying to decipher what Justin is saying is like Paris Hilton trying to decipher the garage door code to her house. For example: "Justin did you go out last night?" Justin's response: "Nah, I got da bop in ma room, den I messed with dis little X Box joint for like half hour. Ya dig?" Can't say I do Justin. (By the way, you can ask me what bop means in person if you don't already know.) In all seriousness, Justin is an unbelievable athlete and a genuine, good person on top of that. I wish Justin the best in the future.

Ah, last but not least, Billy Walsh. For those of you that don't read the blog, which is probably only like 2 or 3 noobs, Chad Millard's alias is Billy Walsh. Now that you know that, it's not so much an alias as it is just something Chad wanted me to call him when I shout him out on the blog. And if you don't know who Billy Walsh is, or you think you know by saying the former great San Francisco 49ers coach, you need to watch Entourage, Season One. Chad is potentially the most irrational, absurd, and vile human being I've ever met. Chad Millard is a dichotomy in and of himself. He is beyond irrational, doesn't think smartly at times, and always has something new up his sleeve that's his new hobby or obsession. He's like a cross between George Costanza and Matt Damon. (I don't even know how to interpret that combo.) Despite all of the things that I just mentioned about Chad, he's an extremely nice dude and a loyal friend, above all else. He was the first person to befriend me on this team, so that's kind of why I'm giving him a longer shout-out than the other three. His basketball career didn't pan out as many thought or even Chad probably thought, but as I've stated since the first week I was at Creighton this summer, Chad is easily the most talented basketball player I've ever played with. Hands down. No question about it. He's played with or knows most any basketball player you can come up with and is beyond knowledgable about the game. He could tell you stories about guys he's played with, guys he knows, Coach Pitino (he played at Louisville his freshman year) for hours on end, and it would never get old. I wish Chad the best in his future endeavors and am glad to call him my good friend.

In my next post, I will recap the Missouri Valley Tournament and give you in-depth knowledge into the game of basketball and important life lessons. Actually not at all, I'll mainly talk about the tourney. Anyways, as these four seniors know much better than anybody...Simple plays, fellas, simple plays.