After 16 Years, There's New Life On the Hilltop

Well, as you've most certainly heard by now, we have a new head basketball coach. Coach McDermott, by way of Iowa State, is now in charge. It was officially announced on Monday, press conference Tuesday, and he met with us as a team Tuesday afternoon. Iowa State wasted no time hiring a new coach either. The Cyclones hired former Iowa State star and Ames native, Fred Hoiberg. Hoiberg played in the NBA for eleven seasons and was just in the front office for the Minnesota Timberwolves. Interesting hire for the Cyclones. It's certainly been a whirlwind last few days. The paper has been all about coach Altman, coach McDermott, and the changes in both programs for five days now. It's kind of starting to get old, but it's the nature of the media.

My friend Ben and I were discussing how odd is to see a different head coach lead the Jays. For as long as I can even remember comprehending human activity, coach Altman has always led CU. It really hit me that he's no longer the coach when coach McDermott first spoke to us as a team a couple days ago. I'm excited for new things and new life with coach McDermott, but it's also sad to see coach Altman go as well. He was a great coach. But enough of all this b.s. you've all heard and read about a million times the past week; it's time to get to the good stuff.

This is my last blog post of the year, so it's only fitting I give awards out to our team and members of the Jays community, right? In the words of Josh Jones, "Right, right, right, I feel that." So here it is, your 2009-10 "Simple Plays Medallions."

Most Valuable Player: Justin Carter. But only because he scored the most points. If any of you actually watched the debacle that was last season, you'll probably reason that their really wasn't a most valuable player.

Person Most Inclined to Think They Could Start for the Lakers: Josh Jones. Again, this is a man that legitimately thinks he could beat Allen Iverson one on one. Also a man who doesn't think college teams should have to run plays. "We should just hoop," he says. Complete delusion, but I love it.

The Lifting Can't Fix Your Face Award: Derek Sebastian. Talk about lifting weights until you fail. I dare anyone to take weight lifting more serious than Derek does. He's like Lou Ferrigno trapped in Ross Ferrarini's body...just awkward.

I'm American Award: Casey Harriman. Just loves to have his shirt off, jeans shorts on, and Coors Light in his hands. And loves to scream, "AMERICA." You get the point.

Most Absurd Human Being Award: Easy one. Chad Millard. Never know which direction he's going to go in, but you know it's always going to be interesting.

Whitest Division One Basketball Player Award: Matt Dorwart. Sidney, Nebraska, transparent skin tone, skin and bones, Catholic, blonde hair, no athleticism, and a silky smooth J. God love ya Matt.

Most Likely to Get Made Fun of Every Time He Speaks: Kenny Lawson. An 85% chance something stupid is going to come out of his mouth every other sentence, thus he gets made fun of.

Best Walk-On in Division One Basketball: Me, obviously. I am the one who dubbed this blog after our former coach's most infamous saying...Simple plays, fellas, simple plays.

Duck, Duck, Goose?

Let me apologize up front for the title of this most recent post. I'm not really quite sure what it even means, to be honest, I just thought I'd make an attempt at a funny and/or clever pun given the current situation. Based on your sense of humor, you can decide if I exceeded or not. But as most of you already know by now, our head coach is leaving the program to take the head coaching job at Oregon. Phil Knight, Nike headquarters, a brand new arena, the PAC-1o, and an absurd combination of jerseys and colors await him. I wish Coach Altman nothing but the best. He's a great coach and an even better human being. Many people aren't happy with the way things ended here with him at the helm, but I would have loved to play my four years here with him as the head honcho.

Everything kind of came as a blur yesterday. I was sitting on Facebook when a friend of mine who is studying abroad in Spain, and who I literally haven't talked to and/or seen in about a year "facebook chatted me." He told me what he had been hearing and asked if I knew anything, so I just figured this was another stupid rumor about Altman being a candidate at Oregon a la people saying he was a candidate for the coaching position at Wake Forest a couple of weeks ago. I assured Gregg it was fine and all was well here in Omaha. Then Gregg gave me a link to an article on Fox Sports, and I was caught quite off-guard. I still didn't give it much thought until another one of my friends, Brad, again "facebook chatted me." He linked me to an article on cbssports.com and now it all started to sort of catch my attention. My phone had been charging in the other room and when I went to pick it up I had countless texts and calls from friends wondering what the deal was. We were supposed to play pick-up at four at the Qwest so I assured everyone I would find out then.

I don't think I've ever been excited or thrilled about going to play pick-up, but Saturday I was given the circumstances because I wanted to find out what was really going to happen. The coaches didn't show up until past four, and even then it was only our grad assistant Mike Jones and our athletic director Bruce Rasmussen. We were all skeptical when Ras showed up. We were expecting him to break the news to us. However, all he told us was that coach Altman was offered the job, and that he needed 24 hours to decide what the right decision was for him. We played our pick-up games with reporters and photographers trying to get in on the action. (Creighton pick-up games usually garner a ton of attention, so this isn't anything unusual.) After pick-up, myself and Matt Dorwart were walking out to my car when we stepped outside and three or four reporters were videotaping us and asking us if we knew anything. My initial instinct was to pull a Randy Johnson and yell, "GET THE CAMERA OUT OF MY FACE," but I got cold feet. Very awkward with them following you and videotaping you. Beyond awkward actually. I was wearing a dry fit cut-off and just looked like a total goober. It is what it is.

Later in the evening, I received a text from coach Jones saying that Ras wanted to meet with us in the locker room at 8:30. This time, we knew. Ras confirmed that coach Altman was leaving, and it all became pretty surreal. We all took it upon ourselves to go into coach Altman's office and thank him and congratulate him. He was very emotional, and it was tough to see. That's the nature of the business though. Money makes the world go round. A chance to do something very significant is always calling us. He told us he was going to Eugene Sunday to meet with his new players. I have a pretty good feeling what he told them...Simple plays, fellas, simple plays.

Q & A with Former Jay Chad Millard

Well I've given you all what you have wanted: an interview with a dedicated Jays fan. Actually none of you wanted that because nobody actually reads this blog, but nevertheless, I gave you that interview anyways. Now I'm about to give you another interview with a more important figure of the Jays community: Chad Millard. Now most of you know Chad as the one-time Louisville transfer that never really panned out to what most thought he was going to be as a player here at CU. Despite that shortcoming, Chad has been a fan favorite anyways, winning people over with his intensity (See: Nick Evans, SIU game) and his personable and colorful personality. I'm going to give you a little bit more of the Chad Millard I know, the one-time number one rated high school prospect in all of New England, and once had a feature on him in Slam magazine when he was in high school. Yes, you read that last sentence correctly.

How are you today Chad?

Pretty good.

I understand you're going golfing soon?

This is true, I'm going with the members of "Sweetness."

Can you elaborate on what "Sweetness" is?

I can not.

Interesting. What are your thoughts now that your basketball career has officially come to an end?

My thoughts are the exact same as they were prior to my commencement from basketball.

Won't go there then. Have you enjoyed your four year stay in Omaha?

Yes I have.

That's phenomenal to hear it's a great city. I understand you have no current plans for next year?

I have many plans actually. I'm going to attempt to make the PGA Tour.

That would be quite an extraordinary feat. Are you more at peace playing golf or basketball?

When I play basketball by myself I find myself very at ease and relaxed.

Wow wasn't expecting that answer actually. What advice do you have for us current Jays players regarding next season?

Don't let everyone who is down on the program right now affect your work ethic and outlook for next year. 95% of the fans who support us don't necessarily understand what we go through basically 11 months out of the year and that, in fact, we are regular people and do have trials and tribulations in our every day lives outside of basketball. To conclude this answer, I would tell the guys just to be confident, to be focused, and work hard, and to come together as a common unit and go out and achieve your goals.

Fondest memory of your Jays career?

Just how I felt during the Southern Illinois game this year when all the fans really embraced me.

What exactly happened between you and Nick Evans?

Nick Evans threw a cheap shot towards my neck, and I had a few choice words for him after that, and then he got the ball and I stole it from him with my lightning quick hand ability and said another choice word to him, and with all his frustration and aggression, he hit me, and my initial instinct was to chase him down.

Many people don't know your background as a basketball player. You were the number one rated player in New England in high school correct?


Yeah.


How did you hone your game growing up as a kid?

Lived at the YMCA. I used to not go to school and just go to the YMCA. My mom would just drop me off at the Y before school at like 7 and I would just play all day.


It has come to my attention that the emcee at Rucker Park used to dub you, "Baby Van Horn." Why that nickname?


When I was younger, Van Horn was the good white player at the time. We had similar size and I don't know that's just what they called me.


What were some of the notable names on your AAU teams growing up?


Played with Jerome Dyson (UConn), Vernon Goodrich (Miss St), Marcus Johnson (Tennessee), Emanuel Negadu (Tennessee), Jeff Adrien (UConn), Chris Lutz (Purdue), Luke Bonner (West Virginia).


Pretty impressive. Best player you've ever played with on the same team? And best player you've ever played against?


I've played with Rashad McCants (NBA's Timberwolves), Matt Bonner (NBA's Spurs), Terrence Williams (NBA's Nets), Taquan Dean (Former Lousiville standout), Tyler Hansbrough (NBA's Pacers), Kyle Korver (NBA's Jazz).

Best player you've ever played against?

Rudy Gay, Randy Foye, Curtis Sumpter, Rashad McCants, Matt Bonner, OJ Mayo. I mean I've played with a lot of NBA dudes. Never the likes of LeBron, Kobe, etc. but a lot of NBA guys.

What was playing for Coach Pitino like?

Tremendous experience. The best basketball mind I've ever been around. I learned a ton. His preperation was unbelievable. His favorite saying was, "Failing to prepare is preparing to fail." I learned a ton about the offensive and defensive sides of basketball. I learned so many schemes and proper ways to go about things. He was so meticulous in the ways he went about things. I learned so many things about basketball that most people have no clue is so important and crucial to winning and being successful.

Favorite experience at Louisville?

Playing at Syracuse, it was the biggest regular season crowd that year, like 31,000 or so.

What was the best game you had at Louisville?

At home against Villanova. Both ranked Top Ten.

Tell me about your experience playing at Kentucky.

To date, the greatest basketball experience of my life. 25,000 who bleed blue and who hated red. You couldn't hear the person standing next to you. Rondo killed us, played unbelievable. We had to watch film of the game on the bus ride home and had practice immediately when we got back.

Do you ever look back and wish things would have been different for your basketball experience?

I mean, yeah, there's days I wish my career would have gone differently. I had injuries and that's the way it goes. I would have loved to have ended up making money playing basketball some day, but I have to deal with the cards that were dealt to me, and I'm fine with all of it.

So you're at ease with everything now?

Yeah I have no choice but to be, I can't be one of those people who is looking back wondering what if?

Thanks for the interview Chad, I appreciate it.

No problem Rossco.

Q & A with Jays Superfan Ben Frock

As we wind down on the end of the school year, I came to the realization that I haven't received much (actually none at all) feedback from any of the loyal Jays fans. And quite honestly, as I'm running out of ideas for new blog posts that will take me to my desired ten posts this semester for my Journalism class, I figured an interview with my good friend Ben would fulfill both of the requirements previously mentioned.


Ben was born and raised right here in Omaha, and his family has been Jays season ticket holders for as long as he can remember. Get some cold beverages in him, and he can rant for days about the program, for better or for worse. And yes, he does don wool sweaters in the middle of April, but hey, he's a Jays fan and an Omaha disciple, so who better to interview?

How are you on this fine Monday evening Ben?

I'm ready for the Missouri Valley Tournament next year.

That's quite aways away Ben. Why the anticipation?

Seeing us (Creighton) get romped two years in a row can only mean better things ahead.

Agreed. What are your thoughts on the Creighton basketball program currently?

Something isn't going well, and to put as simply as possible...our players don't play with enough emotion.

Bold statement. What would you like to see the Jays improve?

Defense and wanting to look like you want to win, and some sign that our players care that the program has been under-performing as of late.

You're being very blunt right now, it's kind of awkward.

Not as awkward as it is to see Dana and Darryl having a conversation on the sidelines.

Awkward indeed. What has been your favorite Jays memory since you were conceived into this world?

I would have to say Kyle Korver and Larry House's final game at the Civic, which was also the final Creighton game ever at the Civic. (Editor's note: until the much hyped and anticipated CIT this year.) Just phenomenal.

As I continue this interview, can you explain to me why you're watching cover videos of Rihanna's "Rude Boy" on YouTube as we speak?

What can I say I'm a fan of Rihanna and everything she does, and ever since her Chris Brown incident, I can't help but have a soft spot in my heart for her.

You're pleasing feminists everywhere. By the way, quite the transition from "Rude Boy" to Gucci Mane's "My Kitchen" video, I might add.

(Ben looking up Gucci Mane quotes.)

Back to basketball. Who would you say is your favorite Jay of all time?

Ryan Sears.

Seriously?

Probably. Dan Bresnahan is a close second. His quality bench minutes provided a whole new dimension to the team. Conversely, Ryan Sears and his love for Theology are hard not to love.

Two very bizarre reasons for appreciating your favorite Jays players. However, Sears does love a Gospel of Luke read, and Bresnahan does love a good walk-on fist pump or five, so nice choices.

In the words of Gucci Mane, "I ball all through the winter, and I stunt all through the summer." Need I say more?

Simply stunning. Didn't anticipate so many Gucci Mane references in the interview, but I press on. What would you rather have, a Jays Elite Eight Run, or dare I say, Final Four run, or the Cubs winning the World Series?

Jays Final Four. Born in the O, allegiance to the O.

(Tears streaming down my face.) Do you think a Jays Final Four run is out of reach?

If we keep at the pace we've been at, then no, but if we build on our team principles we once had a la the early 2000's then I don't see why not. If Butler can do it, why can't we?

The odds we weren't going to get a Butler-Creighton connection in this interview were not very good, so kudos for giving a Butler drop.

I have to give my props to a mid-major in the Final Four.

What game are you most looking forward to next season?

Northern Iowa at the "Quiet Center."

Ouch, better hope Rohan (devoted sports enthusiast) doesn't hear that statement.

(Ben giggling.)

Favorite thing about Creighton Basketball Camp? Excuse me, Dana Altman Basketball Camp?

Dare I say selling pop caps to second graders for two dollars a piece and making upwards of thirty dollars?

As I projected, a non-basketball related answer was given. Thoughts on Doc Sadler and the basketball program to the south?

I appreciate him for certainly stirring up the rivalry, but I dislike his accent and the color red.

Yeah, you always looked weird in red anyways. As I close this ground-breaking interview, who will have a better record this upcoming season, the 'Skers or your Fighting Irish on the gridiron?

In Charlie Weis's absence, the Irish will flourish.

Even without Jimmy "The Emu" Clausen?

I will miss Jimmy with all my heart, the greatest Irish player to every play the game.

Quite a stretch. Thank you for your input on the Jays, and God speed Ben.

Bomb.

NCAA Tournament Recap

Damn you Gordon Hayward! Just when you thought all that b.s. every analyst and their brother was giving us about the Hoosiers similarities in the Butler run was actually coming to fruition...backboard, iron, floor. It really would've been too good to be true. It would've warranted immediate production on Hoosiers 2, except for having Gene Hackman as head coach, it'd have Keanu Reeves playing Butler head coach Brad Stevens, and Gordon Hayward would be played by Justin Bieber. Plus the shot would've gone in and Hayward (Bieber) would've been mobbed on the floor by every woman in Lucas Oil Stadium a la the Axe (or Tag?) body spray commericals.

Instead of watching absolute chaos ensue should Hayward have made the shot, we had to suffice to watching Coach K awkwardly giving post-game interviews and Brian Zoubek wearing his New Era (I'm assuming) National Champions hat to the side of his head. Sigh. Order was restored and now we all will wake up in the morning, take a piss, and wash our hands because Duke is yet again on top of the basketball world, which means the rest of the country will return to normalcy. (Don't tell that to Republicans.)

All in all, the 2010 NCAA Tournament was incredible. If you're a fan of the little guy, then this was the tournament for you. Butler, Northern Iowa, Cornell, Murray State, St. Mary's. They all proved they can play on the big stage. Those teams give hope to teams such as Creighton. Now maybe we can make the National Championship game! Or at least the Sweet 16!!! In all honesty, if those teams can make it to the promise land, we can make it to the promise land. The entire country had Butler's back, everyone pulling for the little guy. Will Butler become a national power from now on? I don't know and neither do you, and although it's doubtful they will become one, at least they gave us a ride to remember for the rest of our lives. Kind of ironic that old Nebraska basketball head coach Barry Collier is the Bulldogs' athletic director. Nebraska suffered terribly during the Collier era, yet the Bulldog's have thrived with him as athletic director. Does Barry Collier even care? Probably not, the guy shows less emotion than your typical indie music scene newspaper columnist, but he should be proud of the job he has done for a tiny, private, Horizon League oriented university in the heart of a proud basketball state.

What were Simple Plays' top ten moments of this past NCAA Tournament, you ask? Well, for starters, I don't exactly remember everything that happened throughout the entire tournament. (Consider the fact that I had school, and I had less days off to the start of offseason workouts since our CIT loss than Jay Leno gave himself when he "retired.") You're probably going to get a half-ass, David Letterman-esque Top Ten (Who actually likes his Top Tens?) compared to a Travel Channel Top Hawaiian Beaches Top Ten, but I'll give it my best shot.

10) Former Creighton freshman stud and current Murray State stud Isaac Miles was MSU's leading scorer and dished the final assist to teammate Danero Thomas as Thomas swished an elbow jumper as time expired to upset 4-seeded Vandy in the first round.

9) Go Big Red! No, not your beloved Husker football team, but the Cornell Big Red! A Sweet 16 run by the Nerds from the North made 4.0 students everywhere awkwardly excited, and most certainly pleased Andy Bernard.

8) Jimmer Fredette. Yes, Jays fans, assuming Fredette doesn't go the NBA, you will see him in the Q next year as we play BYU in the Mountain West-Missouri Valley Challenge. All of DJ's Dugout (my hotspot for the first two rounds) was going wild for Jimmer every time he scored. He refused to pass, but who cares because he scored every time he touched it, and he looked more like a mormon Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino than a phenomenal basketball player.

7) Robert Morris almost upset 2-seeded Villanova in the first round which would have been only the fifth time in the history of the tournament that had happened. It went into overtime and of course Villanova prevailed, but that didn't prevent a friend of mine that attends Villanova to text me that, "Robert Morris is playing dirty." Yes Tom, I'm sure that's the reason it was so close.

6) Korie Lucious' buzzer beating three in the second round sent Greivis Vasquez and the Terps home and set up a Sweet 16 matchup with a familiar Valley foe.

5) Down goes Frazier! Whoops, I mean Kansas. Our fellow Missouri Valley compatriots, the Northern Iowa Panthers, knocked off the No. 1 overall seed of the tournament in the second round.

4) He floats like a butterfly and stings like a bee. No, not Casey Harriman, but Ali Farokhmanesh! I apologize for the boxing references, but they seemed to fit perfectly into where I was going with numbers four and five. (I'm so clever with Northern Iowa's star player being named Ali, don't you think?) Farokhmanesh came out of nowhere in the Big Dance hitting the game-winning three against UNLV in the first round, and sinking the hearts of Jayhawk fans everywhere in the second round with a dagger three to put the Panthers up four with 30 seconds left and having the Jayhawks' national championship aspirations torn to shreds.

3) Huggy Bear is so affectionate. What a weird sight that was. As WVU star player Da'Sean Butler went down and tore his ACL in the second half of the Mountaineers' Final Four game against Duke, head coach Bob Huggins felt it necessary to console his player as if Butler was dying in the middle of the floor. He lied down practically on top of his star player and gave him some kind words (I'm assuming, but then again, we are talking about Bob Huggins here) and consoled him for a good thirty seconds before CBS even finally got uncomfortbale and decided to just show replays intead. All uncomfortability aside, it was a nice gesture from coach Huggins.

2) Hickory High, err, the Butler Bulldogs. Yes, I did just make that reference for the 987,000th time this past month. The tiny Bulldogs had an entire nation supporting them and pulling for the little guy, which was pretty cool to see. They played fundamental, great team defense, and played extremely well together. The ultimate underdog story.

1) The shot heard round the world needed an inch more arc on it, and we'd be talking about probably the greatest end to any sporting event of all-time. It wouldv'e been the most significant sports story of all time. David beats Goliath (sorry, you've heard that one a million times too) on a half-court shot as time expires? Too bad things like that don't actually happen. Maybe for another lifetime. For now, we'll have to settle with the Dookies being dubbed the best again, and now we'll have to see them and face-painted girls and Valedictorians on ESPN double the amount than we're used to. Like I said earlier, order was restored in the sports world and it makes one wonder if Coach K lives by Coach Altman's favorite mantra...Simple plays, fellas, simple plays.

St. Louis Recap, CIT, and Ali Farokmasdnsenensah

Well, as most of you already know, we lost in the first round of the Missouri Valley Tournament to Bradley. Sam Maniscalco and his dirty half-goatee-type-thing (he only has facial hair on his chin, what is the specific name for this?) had 31 points against us and dashed any hope that our 9-0 opening game run had any significance whatsoever. The Braves ended up winning 81-62, and we were subsequently sent back to Omaha. The rest of the Valley Tourney really didn't garner any other surprises as the expected favorite, Northern Iowa, won the whole thing.


The week after St. Louis was spring break and most of the other conference tournaments were finishing up and/or beginning. It was a very exciting week filled with buzzer beaters, floor burns, a solid defensive stance and Frank Martin stepping WAY outside of his coaching box. Most of the favorites won their conference tournaments, with the exceptions of New Mexico State out of the WAC and Ohio out of the MAC.

Because of our first round exit in St. Louis we got the dubious honor of playing in the CollegeInsider.com Tournament. Yes, you read that correctly. Now I know some of you probably didn't even know this tournament existed, and you have good merit to believe this; it's only the second year this tournament has been up and running. Some experts would have you believe it's the fourth and last best tournament in college basketball, trailing the Big Dance, NIT, and the CBI. So go ahead and get your CIT jokes in now, we're all really impressed. (Sorry, Seinfeld drop there.)

As we're drowning our sorrows in the CIT, fellow Valley...ers? Northern Iowa are doing their thing in the NCAA Tournament. ALLLLIIIII Farokmanesh (I think that's how you spell it) has been the Panther's version of Big Shot Bob Horry by hitting the game winning threes against UNLV Thursday night and everyone's favorite to win the tourney, Kansas, on Saturday night. The man can flat out shoot. About as pretty as a jump shot as you'll see, quite honestly. He looks like Steve Nash and Jeremy Piven's chubby kid, should those two ever mate, and probably shoots just as well as the Phoenix point guard, too. The Panthers' backbone is solid outside shooting, great help defense, and generally just playing much harder than their opponents. They're pretty much what you expect out of an almost all-Caucasian collegiate basketball team. They can't jump, they can't run, they sure as hell can't dunk (Ok, that's a lie), but they enjoy playing with each other and playing the game the right way. As Billy Hoyle once said to Sidney Deane in White Men Can't Jump (oh, the irony of that last sentence), "Yo, pretty boy! I looked up basketball player in the dictionary and it said 'Not you!'" Ok, so that sentence didn't pertain to anything I was discussing about the Northern Iowa Panthers, but I found it amusing and wanted to drop a White Men Can't Jump quote somewhere in this post.

As I finish this post about the hectic world in college basketball these days, I will forge ahead with my next post covering the NCAA Tournament. This next post could be epic, so I'm warning you ahead of time. As Ali Farokmanesh knows all too well...Simple Plays, fellas, simple plays.

Nearing MVC Tourney and a Phenomenal Senior Day

Well, the Missouri Valley Conference Tournament starts today in St. Louis. (Or should I say Arch Madness? The marketing department for the MoValley are beyond clever.) We open play at 2:30 CST against the Bradley Braves for the third time this year. (We won the first two, obviously.) For most Creighton fans, "Arch Madness" or "St. Louis," as most of you simply refer to it as, is even better than receiving a Nintendo 64 for Christmas. It's all I've heard about for the past two months. Most of the CU fan base (especially my friends) use St. Louis as an excuse to support the team and get blitzed out of their minds. It's pretty epic. I'm interested to hear what stories come out of St. Louis this year.


Along with the start of our conference tournament, most low-major conference tournaments have begun this week as well. Some teams are getting close to punching their tickets to the Big Dance as we speak. Cornell is technically the first team to get in because the Ivy League doesn't have a conference tournament, so the regular-season conference winner gets their bid. The Big South will be the second conference to get a bid, with their final tomorrow between Coastal Carolina and Winthrop. For the most part, the small-conference tournaments have begun this week or will begin this weekend.

Besides the exciting time of year that is "Championship Week," as the people at ESPN have dubbed it, we just rounded out or final home game of the year. Senior Night versus the Bradley Braves was an entertaining one, with Bradley even hitting a half-court shot at the buzzer at the end of the first half. Despite 27 points from the Braves' Taylor Brown, we held on to win 82-71. It was a great way for our three seniors to end their careers at the Qwest Center and all that bologna you've probably heard from Coach Altman and everyone else a thousand times. I was excited for our three seniors though. Despite the setbacks and tough times we've had as a team this year, they tried the best they could to make their last season memorable. Three great dudes and great basketball players. Their speeches to the crowd after the game were phenomenal too. Justin and Chad both got a little teary eyed, (actually they both legitimately cried) and all three of them received really nice ovations from the crowd. Our head manager, Brian Kooeniga, was honored too, which was a really nice gesture to him and how much he's meant to the team.

So what better way for Simple Plays to honor the Jays' three senior players and senior manager? To roast them of course! Just kidding. Kind of. I'm not very good at those sorts of things, but I will give you my own personal opinions, thoughts, and stories of the four seniors previously mentioned. Let's get it on.

Brian Kooeniga probably spends triple the time around the Creighton basketball team than he does his own roommates. The man is the absolute backbone to our team. Without him, well, quite frankly, we probably wouldn't even be able to field a team. He does it all. He cuts up game film, types up scouting reports, does all of our laundry, helps run practice, texts every important detail that we need to know about anything basketball-related, and he changes our diapers. He's like Octomom and Dana Altman combined into one. The pride of Urbandale, Iowa, he is the Creighton University Men's Basketball Head Manager. He is OctoDana, err, Brian Kooeniga.

Cavel Witter. Where do I even begin? A genuinely nice human being who, quite simply, just wants to play basketball. That's it. An absolute gym rat and easily the hardest worker on our team, Cavel is a very talented guard. Often criticized for his excessive amount of dribbling and his inane ability to not make the extra pass or "simple play," Cavel has worked his arse off to prove every doubter and critic wrong. I'm not sure if he's exceeded or not, that's your call as a fan, but he definitely has my respect. As Reggie Miller said about Larry Brown in the phenomenal ESPN 30 for 30 documentary Winning Time, "Larry is a perfectionist in an imperfect game." Cavel is the same way.

Justin Carter was put on this earth to do two things: jump abnormally high and virtually speak a foreign language when he is supposed to be speaking the same language as you. Justin has an uncanny ability to twist every single word of the English Dictionary into "Justin-speak." Trying to decipher what Justin is saying is like Paris Hilton trying to decipher the garage door code to her house. For example: "Justin did you go out last night?" Justin's response: "Nah, I got da bop in ma room, den I messed with dis little X Box joint for like half hour. Ya dig?" Can't say I do Justin. (By the way, you can ask me what bop means in person if you don't already know.) In all seriousness, Justin is an unbelievable athlete and a genuine, good person on top of that. I wish Justin the best in the future.

Ah, last but not least, Billy Walsh. For those of you that don't read the blog, which is probably only like 2 or 3 noobs, Chad Millard's alias is Billy Walsh. Now that you know that, it's not so much an alias as it is just something Chad wanted me to call him when I shout him out on the blog. And if you don't know who Billy Walsh is, or you think you know by saying the former great San Francisco 49ers coach, you need to watch Entourage, Season One. Chad is potentially the most irrational, absurd, and vile human being I've ever met. Chad Millard is a dichotomy in and of himself. He is beyond irrational, doesn't think smartly at times, and always has something new up his sleeve that's his new hobby or obsession. He's like a cross between George Costanza and Matt Damon. (I don't even know how to interpret that combo.) Despite all of the things that I just mentioned about Chad, he's an extremely nice dude and a loyal friend, above all else. He was the first person to befriend me on this team, so that's kind of why I'm giving him a longer shout-out than the other three. His basketball career didn't pan out as many thought or even Chad probably thought, but as I've stated since the first week I was at Creighton this summer, Chad is easily the most talented basketball player I've ever played with. Hands down. No question about it. He's played with or knows most any basketball player you can come up with and is beyond knowledgable about the game. He could tell you stories about guys he's played with, guys he knows, Coach Pitino (he played at Louisville his freshman year) for hours on end, and it would never get old. I wish Chad the best in his future endeavors and am glad to call him my good friend.

In my next post, I will recap the Missouri Valley Tournament and give you in-depth knowledge into the game of basketball and important life lessons. Actually not at all, I'll mainly talk about the tourney. Anyways, as these four seniors know much better than anybody...Simple plays, fellas, simple plays.

A New Scout Team Look and Utah Jazz Practice Shorts

Josh Jones has been promoted. As much as it disappoints me to say this and as much as it hurts me physically and emotionally...Josh Jones is no longer part of the Creighton University men's basketball scout team. Josh added many elements to our team. Mainly, an athletic black man, but more importantly, he added comedy at its finest and total oblivion as to what is deemed appropriate and inappropriate to say aloud. Ever since P'Allen's suspension, Josh has seen his minutes go from zero most every game to more than 20. And the thing is, he has more than made the most of his opportunity. Josh has scored at a very effective rate for us and has added a level of confidence and sense of pride and privilege that this team has sorely lacked. Josh's confidence has always been through the roof and that can sometimes be a good thing or a bad thing. Josh couldn't care either way. After all, this is a kid that once told me he thought he could beat Allen Iverson one on one. Yes, THE Allen Iverson. The scout team will sorely miss him.

Despite Josh's bittersweet absence from scout team, we didn't just sit around and hang our heads about the vacant wing absence from our team. We scouted vigorously for a replacement. Actually, not at all. Coach Altman just assigned freshman point guard Andrew Bock to join us for the remainder of the year. This moves Taylor Stormberg from the point guard position to the wing spot, and Andrew has taken over as our point guard. Things have gone swell ever since. I typically get to shoot more since You Know Who has left, and Andrew can typically break the starters' press by himself so I don't really ever have to help bring the ball up the court. My current duties allow me to just catch and shoot, really the only thing I'm good for.

Besides our new scout team, nothing terribly interesting has happened on the Jays homefront. Well, there has been a few things. Now what I'm about to tell you is going to seem so absurd and so ludicrous and so ridiculous, I should expect you to never have any respect for the KLAWSON ever again. Let it be known that I do like Kenny, and I often get a kick out of Kenny, but the man would explode on you if you were to tell him that one sock is about an inch higher on his leg than the other sock. He's like Bob Huggins should Huggins find out that one of his players isn't going to wear a headband for the upcoming game. Bottom line: Kenny freaks out for no apparent and sound reason whatsoever.

Exhibit A: The day before we played Evansville at home, I arrived at the Old Gym about an hour and a half before practice started to lift weights. (It's a hobby of mine.) Seeing as how our mananger, Brian, hadn't yet layed out our practice gear, I scavanged the locker room for any available pair of shorts that I could borrow from someone for the time being. As I glanced inside Kenny's locker, it became apparent that he multiple pairs of shorts. Most of the shorts were much too big for me, a pair of Jordan's even coming dangerously close to my ankles. There was, however, one pair of shorts that fit me particularly well...a nice pair of Adidas Utah Jazz practice shorts. I put on the shorts, went down to the weight room and went about my business. After I finished lifting, I was walking back up to the locker room when I saw Kenny. Kenny about didn't notice that I was wearing his shorts, but at the last possible moment before he went his way and I went mine, he asked if I was wearing his shorts in a tone that, quite frankly, didn't sound like Mother Theresa's.

"Yes Kenny," I said, "I am wearing your shorts." Kenny immediately became flustered and baffled and furious that someone else was wearing his pair of shorts.

"Those are my shorts!" Kenny replied, his blood pressure increasing more rapidly than Stan van Gundy's. "Don't wear my shorts Ross! Don't be going in my locker man, seriously put them back!!" Like I said, Kenny freaks out. I thought that was the end of it. As a matter of fact, I didn't put them back in Kenny's locker. I did him a favor and put them in the laundry basket so Brian could wash them.

The next day, before practice, Kenny asked again where the shorts were. I explained to him that I put the shorts in the laundry basket and that they were either in the laundry basket or in his locker at the Old Gym. (Practice was at the Qwest on this particular day.) Kenny wasn't pleased with this response, so he felt it was his right to tell me that I had to pay him for the shorts should the shorts be lost. That last statement is infuriating on many levels.

First off, the shorts aren't even Kenny's. They're Kaleb's. Why would anyone else on our team have a pair of Utah Jazz practice shorts? Oh yeahhhhh, Kaleb's brother plays for the Utah Jazz. Secondly, Kenny claims that Anthony Tolliver gave him the shorts. Funny he should mention that because, last time I checked, AT has never once been with the Utah Jazz organization, not even for a summer league team. Thirdly, how would they just be lost out of thin air? I put them in the laundry basket, thus Brian knows where they are. He wouldn't just lose the pair of shorts, and on the astronomical chance that Brian would lose the pair of shorts, it would be his responsibility for the shorts, not mine. Fourth, why would I have to pay him for a pair of shorts that a. aren't even his and b. even if they were his, he didn't pay for them, they just happened to be left behind in the locker room one day in the summer? The fact of the matter is, Kenny is absolutely out of his mind to think I would ever pay him for a pair of shorts.

The story doesn't end there. After Kenny's ludicrous statement about me potentially having to pay for the shorts, he bugged the rest of the day about where the shorts were, and to not go through his locker ever again. He promptly asked that I bring the shorts to the Qwest that night before the game. I told him I would. After speaking with Brian though, I realized the shorts were currently in Billy Walsh's possession because Brian thought that that is who the shorts belonged to. I arrived to the Qwest and immediately became bombarded with questions from Kenny as to the whereabouts of the shorts. I explained to him that Billy Walsh had them and he should talk to him about the shorts. You would've thought I bent the bill on Kenny's LA Dodgers fitted hat.

"Alright man, people think they can just go into other people's lockers and steal things from now on!!! I see how it is!!!"

It didn't stop there. He immediately went out onto the floor where Billy Walsh was warming up because, ya know, we have a game in like twenty minutes, and bombarded Billy with questions about the shorts. Billy was baffled as to what Kenny was even talking about. Now Brian is furious with Kenny for worrying about a pair of shorts twenty minutes before our game, and because, well, Kenny should've just asked Brian for the shorts in the first place and we could've avoided this entire debacle.

In any event, the shorts were, in fact, in Billy's locker, and Kenny could stop acting like somebody kidnapped a sibling of his and focus at the task at hand...our basketball game. Unreal. Moral of the story: Don't ever take anything as seriously as Kenny takes seriously a pair of NBA practice shorts. It's much added stress for everybody that isn't needed whatsoever. So next time you're thinking of BORROWING from someone else, think to this story and live by Coach Altman's motto...Simple plays, fellas, simple plays.

Scout Team Woes

This past week in the college basketball world was wild and entertaining, to say the least. Number 1 Texas lost not only once, but twice, Chandler Parsons of Florida hit another game-winner, Tennessee got romped by Georgia, K-State lost to Oklahoma State a mere five days after knocking off Texas, and we dropped our tenth loss of the season at Illinois State on Wednesday. This is certainly the time of year when college basketball starts to heat up around the nation, and it should be interesting to see how many things shake up.

In Creighton news, scout team hasn't been near as fun as of late. We typically run through our opponents' stuff against the starters the day before the game, and that's normally my chance to show my athletic prowess and offensive skill set. However, lately we've only been running through scout team at "3 quarter's speed", which infuriates me on multiple levels. For starters, I can't show off my athletic prowess and skill set that I previously mentioned at "3 quarter's speed." Secondly, what does "3 quarter's speed" even mean? Do i sprint or do I jog? Do I try to embarrass the starters or do I give them a little bit of a break? Do I dunk or just simply lay it up? You get the picture. In any event, "3 quarter's speed" needs to go. It doesn't do any of us any good.

The second issue I've been having with scout team lately is the fact that Josh "No Filter" Jones gets the best roles for every team. He always gets the role of the other teams' best offensive player, and it normally wouldn't bother me since Josh is a scholarship player and the rest of us are walk-ons, so just by the elimination process it would appear that he would be most qualified for such a postition. However, it does bother me, because let's be honest here...Josh doesn't need any more incentive to shoot more as it is. Josh got up a fair amount of shots in high school, and as the old saying goes, Josh has never seen a shot he didn't like, so telling Josh he can shoot whenever he wants on scout team is a lot like telling Tiger Woods that there's never any such thing as too much sex. What's even more absurd about giving Josh these roles is the fact that Josh feels the need to tell you how much he's going to shoot. "I'm about to get buckets," and "I'm gonna 'hibachi' that dude" would probably have to be my favorites. Josh's facial expression upon hearing he was going to be Osiris Eldridge for Illinois State and could shoot any time he wanted is reminiscent of the look on Rad Tad's face upon seeing John Madden pull up to him on the Hall of Fame bus in Little Giants. Utter joy.

Well as I drown my sorrows in the disappoint that currently is Creighton men's basketball scout team, the rest of the team does have much more important matters at hand. Beating Missouri State today would help pull all of our dedicated fans back from the ledge and get us back to .500. We're currently 4-4 in conference play and are trying desperately to not play a Thursday night game in St. Louis. (Sidenote: I say "we" and "us"when describing the team because I am, in fact, a member of the team, but I have no direct impact on the outcome of our games whatsoever, so just disregard most of the we's and us's I use on the blog. You know what I mean.)

Hope to see you all at the game tonight and am going to end this blog with a shoutout to my good friend Johnny Beutler, for he has been begging for one for weeks. I told him it may be difficult to fit him in, considering so many shout-out requests flood my CU-mail every day, but I kept my word and am giving John Beutler a shout-out on the Simple Plays blog. Call me when you're famous Johnny, and always remember...Simple plays, fellas, simple plays.

It's Business Time

Step back from the ledge. Please, for my sake, for your sake, for your daughter's sake (name that movie), step back from the ledge. Matt and I are back in business on the Simple Plays blog. Well, basically only me, but nevertheless, after a long, tumultous, and overdue hiatus of posts onto this blog, I will begin to post again. I apologize for such a long hiatus, and I know most of you have been e-mailing me and posting on my Facebook wall, demanding that I continue to post. Some of you have even dished out some violent threats my way, clearly upset at my lack of motivation towards the blog. (Joking of course). Honestly, the REAL reason I haven't posted since December 8th of the last decade is simply laziness. Now I could go off on a tangent giving excuse after excuse as to why I haven't posted since then, such as finals week, Christmas vacation, not wanting to get out my computer, playing an excessive amount of Mario 64, and spending too much time basking in my glory about 40-minute sessions of strictly defense in practice where I continue to get through ball screens like Dwight Freeney gets around the left tackle, BUT I would be lying to you. And that I cannot live with. I can't lie to my devoted fans and I cannot lie to myself. I have too much integrity.

Ok, secondly, the REAL reason my posting has been resurrected a la Jesus Christ himself is because I have to continue to post. Not for my own personal pleasure or some voice deep inside the depths of my soul that cries out that I need to post to make myself feel like I'm contributing to society in some way. No. I have been resurrected because my Journalism 215 class here at Creighton requires me to write a blog as one of the semester-long assignments in the class. So Simple Plays has new life and I'm more dedicated than ever to the blog. Mainly because my grade depends upon it, but still, dedication is now in full effect.

As the title suggests, it is business time ladies and gentlemen. As DJ Pauly D once said, "I don't even know what that religion is and I don't care; I just wanna get down to business." So let's get down to business. First off, some of you may be questioning my motives and originality with this blog due to the extreme popularity of Ohio State's Mark Titus' blog, Club Trillion. So it is currently time to clear a few things up. I, in no way, copied Mr. Titus in the creation of this blog or used his blog as inspiration or a jumping point for my blog. As a matter of fact, I had decided to start a blog about the outrageous things seen in a college locker room and seen through the eyes of a walk-on the day before I even discovered Club Trillion. And while I think Mr. Titus and his blog are hysterical, Simple Plays is wholly original and has a personality of its own.

Many things have happened in the world of the Jays throughout Simple Plays' hiatus. We've struggled this year. I know that, you know that, and the rest of the fanbase knows that. I have complete confidence we'll be dancing this year. Yes, you read that statement correctly. We're just now starting to figure out all of our roles and are starting to get that we need to play hard on a consistent basis to be able to win consistently. But you don't want to hear me be Coach Altman's parrott. You want the good stuff.

Where to even begin? Since my last post on Dec. 8th, we beat a couple of cupcakes, had an awesome three day Christmas break, and I got another four day break on top of that due to the team traveling to Indiana to play Indiana St. and Evansville. All in all, a phenomenal winter break for myself. And oh yeah, Billy Walsh about had a brawl at halfcourt with SIU's Nick Evans, Wayne Runnels almost overslept our game with Northern Iowa, and we got a massive new transfer by the name of Greg Echenique from Rutgers. Billy's near brawl completely energized our crowd and energized our team as we ended up beating our rivals in what was, basically, a must-win for us at the Qwest. One second I'm watching Nick Evans turn the ball over, and the next second I'm watching Billy sprint after Evans at halfcourt, all while going wild in Evans' face. Evans was ejected for striking Billy in the face.

Greg Echenique entered this world ready to dominate you either through his bad-ass Venezualen roots, his Suh-like frame, or his basketball skills. Take your pick. Although I've never seen Greg play; judging by his stats and the fact that he told Coach K he's coming to The O and he'd better recruit another Brian Zoubek instead of waste his time with him, I'd consider him a bad-ass and a good basketball player. Gregory just boosted the hell out of our scout team, and now I have someone to double-team ball screens with me effectively, so I'm pretty pumped. (Not that I need the help, but I'll take it from time to time). The only thing Gregory needs to learn is Coach Altman's most famous and mind-numbing quote...Simple plays, fellas, simple plays.